Homework Sucks

I used to ridicule my friends doing homework with their kids when I had none of school age.  It seemed like it was the parents that went back to school, relearned what had been forgotten in the dank cobweb filled parts of their brains and it was the parents that were burdened with the curse of homework again.  I used to think it was such a pathetic existence for a grown up.  Shameful that moms are reduced to to doing 7 or 8 year old word problems.  Well karma bites you on the butt, doesn’t it? Gael just started Grade 1 and the homework has began.  Sure it’s just first grade.  You must be thinking that it is chicken feed and I’m a total moron for complaining at this stage.  But first grade was 32 years ago for me.  Heck I can’t even remember what I had for breakfast yesterday, how the hell am I supposed to remember what my English teacher taught me three frigging decades ago!!!

Parents from traditional schools must be snickering now since the earthlings go to a progressive school where homework is no where near as ridiculous and hateful.  In our school it is usually given on Mondays and due on Fridays.  There is also no homework on weekends simply because progressive schools rock! the kids deserve a break on the weekends.  But homework is homework no matter how small.  It still means I have to sit my ADHD son down and get him to focus, follow instructions correctly, make sure he doesn’t get upset over mistakes and above all I have to know what the fuck the homework is about.  A couple of weeks ago I had to rack my brain thinking what proper and common nouns are.  Thank you Google!

I am left with nothing to do but eat my ignorant words.  They were right all along.  Your child’s homework is a total pain the ass.  Homework has got to be the absolute worst part of parenting.  Vaginal tears during childbirth, explosive poops while you’re changing a diaper and toddler incredible hulk tantrums are nothing compared to homework.  Nuh-thing.  Dear friends that I judged, snickered and laughed at, please send me the number of that tutor you were talking about.

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